I have come to the conclusion that having a lot of time on your hands can be dangerous. With nothing else to occupy my mind it has turned to sulking and reminiscing about the past. Most recently, I have been thinking a lot of about friends. Having moved across the country I left a lot of them behind so this tangent has not been surprising as I watch myself drifting away from yet another set of people.
It's funny to think that now almost everyone is a quick search away. It is so easy to reconnect with people you haven't spoken to in years. I am always tempted to do this. I will be looking at old photos and remember the good times I had with someone. But when it comes down to sending them a message I stop. In truth I have nothing to say expect that today I was reminded of them. We no longer share common interests except that back in the day we used to play, go on trips, go to parties or watch simply TV together. This is what stops me from sending that message - why try to hold on to something that is no longer there? Why attempt to revive a dead relationship? The nostalgia tempts me. The rosy memories of happy carefree days tempts me. But these memories are not entirely accurate. They tend to omit the fights and the things we disliked about the other person. It is better to let sleeping dogs lie. So instead, I hoard my memories, letting them exist untainted by reality in the back of my mind where I can cherish them. I am not being passive about this but rather realistic as I have come to realize that friendships as well as all other relationships change over time. Some are just not meant to last forever even if right now you cannot imagine your life without that person there. As someone who has tended to take friendships for granted in the past I have changed. I value the friendships I have held on to and the new ones I have made more than ever. I am also more careful about those I let into my life. I will always cherish the memories of old friends. Other Updates - I am jumping into a new novel - doing preliminary research at the moment - Some more Free Fiction is coming your way - & more blog posts!
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